- If you would like to explore this topic
in greater depth, we recommend:
-
Tantric Sex Positions
-
Kama Sutra of Sexual Positions Book
-
Sexual Positions Video- VHS- Hardcore
-
Sexual positions book II
-
Sexual positions book I
-
Complete Manual of Sexual Positions
-
-
Some Sexual Positions
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Man On Top Sex
Positions: |
| Probably the most common
position used by most couples during intercourse. The
"missionary" being definitely the most popular, we will show
you modified positions to bring life back into this old
favorite like never before. For more information see the text
article below by clicking
here. |
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Woman On Top Sex
Positions: |
Similar to the sitting
positions these woman on top positions give the female partner
a much larger degree of control over both the thrusting and
depth of penetration during sexual intercourse.
Variations on the basic woman on top position are easily
gained with the female switching the direction of her body,
lying back rather than sitting up straight or the male raising
his knees to support the females body. For more information
see the text article below by
clicking here. |
| |
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Side By Side Sex
Positions: |
| These intercourse
positions can be great for increased intimacy for both
partners. With this type of position both partners hands are
free to caress the other partner or stimulate their or their
partners genital region. |
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Sitting Sex
Positions: |
Sitting positions do not
generally allow for deep or fast thrusting by the male,
however they do give the female a great deal of control over
the depth and speed of penetration during intercourse.
The female generally needs to squat in most of these positions
and this can become tiresome, a way around this is quick
pelvic movement rather than relying on her legs to pump up and
down. |
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Advanced (exotic) Sex
Positions: |
Whilst they may not be
the most "comfortable" many positions considered to be
advanced are useful to add variety to spice up your sex life.
These positions can offer a new dimension to your intercourse
sessions, please take it easy though. |
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Standing Sex
Positions: |
Similar to the advanced
positions these standing positions require great physical
endurance.
These positions should only be attempted once both individuals
can balance themselves properly because if the female slipped
off both the male and female could cause injury to themselves,
so please be careful! |
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Oral Sex Positions: |
| Oral sex can be
difficult for some, mostly because they were never shown what
positions are the best to perform this sensual lovemaking
skill, the best position to give and receive oral sex is to be
located directly in front of your partner. |
- Good sex is a potpourri of different ingredients, all of
which combine to make the act pleasurable and memorable. This
section will take you briefly through some of the ingredients of
good vaginal sex, and while intended for all readers, will focus
on heterosexual lovemaking.
Overall, intercourse is an intimate encounter like all the other
activities described in this guide. Like these other activities,
intercourse demands a little bit of know-how and a lot of
communication with your partner.
Women, orgasms and intercourse
Some women have no problem reaching orgasm from simple vaginal
penetration because the movement of the labia can provide some
clitoral stimulation while the nerve endings inside the vagina
are delicately engorged. Still there are many women (some
estimates would say as high as 60%) who for anatomical or
psychological reasons can't reach orgasm from penetration alone.
This isn't because something’s wrong! Sexual intercourse alone
doesn't treat the clitoris to direct stimulation, it almost
ignores this important erogenous area altogether.
A woman who wants to become orgasmic has a variety of options to
try. One of the most useful and enjoyable is a well kept secret
sometimes referred to as the T-position. Begin by the female
partner laying on her back. The man, laying perpendicular
(making a ‘t’), straddles the woman’s leg farthest from him. For
example, if the man lays on the left side of the woman, he
straddles her right leg. The other leg lays atop the man. This
position exposes the clitoris for stimulation, which either
partner can do. Use a water-based lubricant (we recommend
ForPlay lube) and tenderly massage the clitoris while slowly
rocking back and forth, thrusting the penis gently in and out.
While this double stimulation is very gratifying, most important
is how relaxing and intimate it is. Sometimes it's difficult to
provide the required stimulation manually so employ a vibrator.
Vibrators are designed to provide intense clitoral stimulation.
During intercourse, you may want something small and unobtrusive
such as the
Fukuoku finger vibe. This little vibrator fits on the end of
a finger and can provide intense stimulation. Couples find this
method relaxing because they are able to lay down, neither
partner having to hold his or her weight, and intimate because
with a little adjustment you can talk, enjoy wine or just gaze
into one another’s eyes. Being comfortable, relaxed, and
stimulated properly is the key for some women to becoming
orgasmic.
Another method changes the way the woman is entered, creating an
angle that better stimulates the clitoris. First, the woman lies
on her back with her legs shut. Spread some lubricant (not too
copiously) on the man’s penis or dildo if you're using one.
Entry now should cause more stimulation to the clitoris, and
more friction at the nerve-rich surface of the vagina. Many men
also find that it is a very nice feeling on their penis. For a
variation, the man can face his partner's legs and then the most
sensitive part of the penis (frenulum) comes in contact with the
clitoris. Finally, you may wish to use a vibrator during
intercourse. A quality electric vibrator is powerful enough to
provide stimulation to both the clitoris and the penis. Using a
vibrator with the T position offers a nice way to stimulate both
the woman and man. If you're interested in vibrations for two
try:
-
Dual Action Rider
Hand's Free Vibrating Pleasure Ring
Ring of Passion
To thrust or not to thrust
More thrusting does not necessarily mean more fun.
Many couples enjoy insertion and then a simple rocking back and
forth. This can be extremely satisfying because it allows both
partners to relax with one another. Other couples enjoy shallow
thrusting because it provides a great deal of mutual
stimulation. Whatever you prefer, remember that the most
sensitive nerve endings in the vagina are near the opening, and
therefore constant stimulation of that area can be gratifying.
For the male, shallow penetration allows constant stimulation of
the head of the penis and specifically the frenulum which are
both squeezed by the vaginal muscles located near the vaginal
opening. If you do not know what type of thrusting your partner
likes you can exchange positions. One partner can be on top and
dictate the rhythm of penetration and then after a while
exchange positions. This is a way to mutually determine what
sort of rhythm you will have during vaginal intercourse.
Thrusting is made more enjoyable with lubricant. Sometimes a
woman does not produce a sufficient amount of natural
lubrication on her own, and lubrication on both the vagina and
penis are helpful for better sex. Prolonged sex can also deplete
natural lubrication, and creams or oils can be applied at
intervals along the way.
The Missionary Position
- People seem to be obsessed with positions. There are
literally thousands of books written on the subject, each based
on the claim that new postures lead to better sex. Although
positions are a wonderful way to add spark to a relationship,
you should know that it takes a whole lot more than good
acrobatics to make a great lover. Romance, good communication,
patience, physical energy, atmosphere and a person you feel
comfortable with are together far more important for great
lovemaking. That said, here are the infoCenter’s favorite
positions to try for yourselves. Exploration and the willingness
to try new things is important to a dynamic and lasting sexual
relationship. We'd love to hear your feedback about any of the
positions we've listed, or if you have suggestions for new ones.
Enjoy!
That Wonderful Missionary Position
Perhaps the best known position in the Western world,
The Missionary has often been thought of as unadventurous and
amateurish. Nothing could be farther from the truth! In this
very tender and intimate position the man is on top laying down
and facing his partner. The full body contact felt in the
missionary position gives a unique level of closeness between
the two partners which is heightened by the ability to kiss,
caress and hold each other close during coitus. The drawbacks of
such a position have largely to do with the position of the
female. Her pelvic movements are extremely restricted which
means that she plays a more passive role. This limited freedom
is unappealing to many women. Yet, the missionary position
allows for easy entry, deep penetration and uncompromised
intimacy.
The Missionary Position Described
The female lies on her back with her legs spread
apart. The male then lowers himself on top of the female with
his arms supporting his weight. From this position the male has
the freedom to thrust or make circular movements with his
thighs. If he lowers himself closer to her and rests some of his
weight on top of her body, his pubic bone can provide gentle
clitoral stimulation. The female can thrust her middle body
towards the man using the support of her legs, or grasp the man
from behind controlling somewhat his thrusting movements.
Adding to the Missionary Position 1:
Lifting Legs
Once you and your partner are in the missionary
position, you can try many variations which will give different
sensations. The first is that the woman can lift and bend her
legs slightly with her feet flat on the mattress. Many women
find this position more comfortable than the traditional
missionary position. It allows for greater access to the vagina
which means that both partners will enjoy more intense
stimulation. This position can be further enhanced if the woman
can put her feet on her partner's buttocks. Adding a
particularly delightful feel for the female as the male's pubic
bone gently rubs against her clitoris. This is only one slight
variant to the traditional position but this simple change will
have effects on the way you both feel.
- Adding to the Missionary Position
2: Locking Legs
For those of you who want to experience deeper
penetration than the previous position, it can be attained quite
easily. In this case the woman raises her legs higher and locks
them around her partner. The higher she can raise her legs, the
deeper the penetration because access to the vagina is better
facilitated. If she has the flexibility to lock her legs around
her partner then she can contribute to his leverage by squeezing
him close to her or just hold him with her thighs. Many men find
that the feel of their partner's legs around them to be a real
turn on. One significant drawback of this position is that some
men find it results in hurried orgasms. For this reason we might
suggest that you leave this position towards the end of your
lovemaking.
- Adding to the Missionary Position
3: Over the shoulders
One of the great positions in lovemaking is when the
woman places her legs on her partner's shoulders, on both sides
of his head. From this position lovers can attain the deepest
possible penetration. Be aware that this position can allow too
deep a penetration, causing irritation for the woman. The man
should always take his cues from his partner and move slowly.
The further back her legs are the deeper the possible
penetration.
- Adding to the Missionary Position
4: Kneeling male
Are you feeling a bit adventurous? Although the
previous positions have focused on comfort or depth of
penetration we have another which promises a unique feeling. The
female lies on her back on the bed with the male kneeling and
sitting on his ankles between her thighs. From this position he
grabs her thighs and brings her to him. Her bottom and lower
back are elevated while her ankles or lower legs rest on his
shoulders. To add to her comfort you can place a pillow under
her lower back and a couple under her head. Unfortunately there
can still be some muscle strain experienced by the woman so this
position can not be held for a prolonged period. The female can
massage her clitoris manually in this position, or her partner
can apply a vibrator. The
Pocket Rocket is a handy little vibrator for these
occasions. Adding variety of stimulation to your lovemaking will
increase the pleasure. You could also try any of the
Mini-vibrator.
An interesting aspect of this position is that the man can view
the penetration easily which for many is an exciting sight. It
also allows the man to deliver a sensual massage of his
partner’s stomach, breasts and arms. This is not a position
designed for speedy movements or rapid lovemaking, but rather a
slow and intimate encounter.
- Adding to the Missionary Position
5: Using your bed
The elevation of the bed makes it possible for some
very interesting positions. In this position the female lies on
the bed with her legs draped over the edge and her feet resting
on the floor. The male then kneels on the floor between her
thighs. The success of this position depends heavily on the
elevation of the bed, which for some is not quite at the height
required. One of the beautiful things about this position is the
range of movement possible for both partners. A woman has more
control over movement as she can press herself against him to
add to the penetration or rotate her hips for interesting
stimulation. Likewise the male has an unparalleled amount of
leverage and freedom of movement.
- Adding to the Missionary Position
6: Legs get together
Most women enjoy the missionary position with legs
apart. This is not necessary and many couples prefer positions
where the woman can keep her legs closed. Added stimulation and
unique sensations are usually what result. When her legs are
closed, a woman’s vagina tightens around her partner’s penis
giving more intense stimulation to both partners. This position
also forces the man to enter from a sharper angle towards the
clitoris adding more stimulation for the woman. The man in this
position may also close his legs, placing all is weight on his
partner. Careful here, some women appreciate this feeling,
others are burdened by it!
- Adding to the Missionary Position
7: Tantric Essences
This is an enjoyable and very special position often
found in Tantric literature. In this position the woman lies on
her back on the bed. Her partner kneels sitting on his ankles
close to her buttocks. From here he hoists both of her legs onto
one of his shoulders. A little bit of guidance from his partner
and you are both in a deliciously unique position. This one is
not for those who have problems with flexibility. You will both
be surprised at the unique angle of penetration which many women
find delightful. The penis massages the side wall of the vagina
which does not get the same attention with other positions. If
the female wants to try massaging the opposite wall of the
vagina then all you must do move her legs to the male's other
shoulder. The movement in this position is mostly up to the
male. Some men may find it difficult to thrust with both legs on
their shoulders but with time it becomes easier. Allow yourself
some time to become accustomed to this position because it is a
tricky one to master.
-
- Many couples feel that the woman on top position is the
greatest way to make love. It permits deep penetration, and
affords a woman more control over the movement and, speed and
depth. For many women, this position is the only one through
which orgasm is possible during intercourse.
This position is quite common and useful for pregnant couples,
especially in the later stages of gestation.
The Woman On Top Position Described
This position is largely self explanatory. The male
lies on his back while his partner straddles his torso. She
controls the rhythm and depth of penetration. He lies supine
with movement inhibited somewhat by her weight and his lack of
leverage. Some women prefer to lay forward so she may kiss her
mate, while others choose to sit up straight. Regardless of
which you prefer, an interesting idea is to just rock back and
forth or in a circular motion while resting on your partner’s
body. There is more clitoral stimulation this way, and it also
has the advantage of the feeling of deep penetration, which some
women really like. Another great advantage is that this motion
is less stimulating than copulation (which is a lot of thrusting
up and down) for a man, and thus he can often last longer this
way.
A particularly enjoyable addition to this position is the
Diving Dolphin. This ring fits over the penis and provides
exquisite clitoral stimulation for her while she's on top. If
there's one toy made for enhancing the female superior position
this it. A vibrating ring truly designed for couples.
Adding to Woman On Top Position 1: Open
and Closed
In what is a true reversal of the missionary
position, this form of the female superior position will give
you both intense feelings of stimulation that you will try to
attain with every position after it. The man lies on his back
with his legs spread apart. She straddles his torso and allows
him to enter her normally. She then lies on top of him closing
her thighs. Because her thighs are closed, more pressure is
placed on the penis which can be pleasurable to both men and
women. The sensations are intense and this position will
normally bring most men to orgasm quite quickly. Of course he is
not the only one being pleased.
- Adding to the Woman On Top 2: About
face
This position requires that the woman sit with her
back to him. The male lies on the bed and the female straddles
his torso, kneeling on either side of him. From this position
she can put her hands on his knees, giving her the leverage to
lift off. This position forces the penis into an uncommon angle,
which many women find extremely exciting.
The opportunities to enhance are only as limited as your
imagination. The male may wish to explore female anal
stimulation during this position. Anal stimulation of the female
is often very pleasurable during coitus. For those of you who
want to explore this avenue of pleasure, you can start by just
pressing on the anus with your fingers. You can then progress
into further degrees of anal stimulation during this position if
this technique is not intense enough.
If she wants to give him additional stimulation during this
position she can reach down with one of her hands and massage
his scrotum. Gentle pulling or massaging is often very desirable
for men.
- Adding to the Woman On Top Position
3: The Ultimate Embrace
Perhaps the most sensual and intimate positions of
all is the Ultimate Embrace (as we've called it). If you are in
love, sexually active and want to experience a meditative-like
state of passionate lovemaking, this position is for you. We
should warn you that (as with all positions) the Ultimate
Embrace can only work to its full potential when its taken
slowly and lovingly. This is not sex, its true lovemaking in the
complete sense of the word.
Its actually quite simple. Begin with the female on top
position. The woman should sit up straight and get comfortable.
Now, the man sits up with her, holding her in his arms and she
holding him. Now the important part: do nothing. Don't move,
just look at each other, hold each other or talk lovingly to one
another. Kiss for a while, laugh, close your eyes. For the next
while, just enjoy the feeling of ultimate closeness and
tenderness. Those deeply in love will relish this one the most.
Enjoy.
- Rear entry offers some types of stimulation that other
positions can't. From behind, a man has more room to move and
alter the thrusting movements he wishes to make. Likewise the
female has a certain degree of movement that is impossible in
other positions. She can work in tandem with her partner guiding
the speed and depth of penetration.
Some couples do not find rear entry positions that enticing.
Some complain that there is a lack of intimacy because the two
partners cannot see each other in the passionate moments they
are spending together. The male gets an intriguing view of his
lover while the female normally must stare at the wall or bed.
The addition of a mirror to the bedroom can reduce this effect.
This way the two partners can see each other and if you set up
the mirrors with some imagination, you can both witness your
passion from any angle you choose.
- The Rear Entry Position Described
Also known by some as "doggy style" the rear entry
position is fairly easy to assume. The woman gets either on her
hands and knees or lays stomach first on the bed with her lover
behind her. He is on his knees or sometimes his feet, and
develops leverage by grasping on to her hips. Depending on
preference the man's legs can be inside of the women's legs or
outside of them. Couples may wish to have the woman's legs
closer together because it creates more friction between the
penis and vagina.
In this position a man has a great deal of freedom for
thrusting. Her movement is somewhat restricted but this can be
easy modified with an ottoman or low bed. The woman can then
rest the upper half of her body on a supporting structure. This
in turn gives her more freedom to move her hips and pelvis. The
rear entry position offers the couple a chance at experiencing
new sensations because the angle of entry is different while
deep thrusting is made much easier. All these factors contribute
to a particularly intense experience if you are with the right
partner. Most men find that it is difficult to prolong their
orgasm while in this position. The stimulation is often too
intense or overwhelming. Consequently the couple may wish to
save the rear entry position as a way to end their lovemaking
session.
- Adding to The Rear Entry Position
1: Forward for Pleasure
While the man lies on his back on the bed, the female
approaches him and straddles his hips with her back to him. Many
people may have tried this position because it is a simple
variant of the woman on top position. The true joy comes when
she leans forward as far as she can. Some women may want to grab
onto their partner's legs and pull themselves down to the bed.
In so doing she drastically alters the angle of penetration.
Some couples may find that it is uncomfortable until they adjust
the angle of her hips a little. Once this adjustment has taken
place she will find sensations unlike any other. She can then
rock back and forth with his legs for support or he may wish to
support her hips with his arms to assist her movement.
Although it is very pleasurable this position provides little
clitoral stimulation. Consequently women who enjoy direct
clitoral stimulation may not enjoy this position as much as
their partner.
- Adding to the Rear Entry Position
2: The chair revisited
That wonderful recliner can be used for another very
satisfying, very relaxing sexual position. This one is
particularly great for those men who have limited mobility due
to accident or illness. The male just sits comfortably upright
in a chair while the woman sits down on his lap as if she was
using the chair as well. Her back is pressed to his chest. The
onus is on the female to provide all the movement in this
position but this movement is extremely easy. With the support
of her arms the female can use her legs to move rapidly or
slowly depending on the couple's preferences.
If a chair is not convenient for you then you may wish to try a
similar position on your bed. Here the male kneels down with his
buttocks on his ankles. The female is directly in front of him
allowing themselves to be elegantly joined. There is not a great
deal of movement available to the couple but this position is
very sensual and is recommended for afterplay. When the couple
is sitting joined, the male can fondle her breasts or even
massage her back. Often it is very satisfying just to sit and
hold her with soft music in the background. From this position
you both can move in unison and lay down on your sides allowing
greater comfort for both partners. Intercourse does not have to
revolve around thrusting; it can be slow, intimate and tender.
- Adding to The Rear Entry Position
3: Face down
One of the most common modifications for the rear
entry position is involves the female lying face down on the bed
with her legs spread apart. The male then straddles the female's
thighs from behind. To facilitate easy entry it is useful to
place a pillow underneath her abdomen to shift the angle of her
hips. Also she can place a pillow beneath her head for added
comfort.
Most men will find that establishing a rhythm with this position
is quite difficult. The problem is that the penis has a tendency
to slip out of the vagina forcing the couple to restart their
lovemaking. Take your time and start with slow shallow thrusts
until you have managed to coordinate a balanced rhythm.
- Adding to The Rear Entry Position
4: Face Up
Lounging while lovemaking is true bliss. It gives the
couple time to discuss how they feel about the moment which can
fuel the fires of passion. Expanding your repertoire should
include some positions dedicated to the relaxing coital
pleasures. This one is a very simple variation on the Face Down
position. The male lies on his back on the bed while the woman
lays on him with her back pressed against his chest. For the men
who can support her weight comfortably this position is a
delight. It allows the man easy access to the clitoris which can
be massaged during the act. This position is excellent for
pregnant couples because it puts no stress on the front part of
a woman’s body.
Spicing up this position is quite easy. Massage oils can be
applied by the male to the female's breasts, shoulders and
stomach. Some oils will heat up when they are applied which can
add extra stimulation to the experience. If you are using
condoms make sure that no oil comes into contact with the condom
that is in use. Other interesting ideas to add to this position
may be a vibrator. She can hold a powerful vibrator near her
clitoris which vibrates the vagina as well. Both male and female
will experience the stimulation and rejoice in its pleasure.
- Adding to the Rear Entry Position
5: Spoons
The spoons position is excellent as a relaxing,
simple position virtually anyone can enjoy. Both partners face
the same direction and lay on their sides, man behind woman. The
man may have to slightly angle his body so that entry is more
easily facilitated. Although thrusting and movement is inhibited
in this position, it is very close and intimate and may be a
perfect way to begin lovemaking.
-
- What is fellatio?
Fellatio is oral sex performed on a man. One thing
remains true in all oral sex encounters: good oral sex starts
with good communication. Finding out what he likes will go a
long way to performing satisfying oral sex. Usually it is best
to ask a man after he has received oral sex so that he can
recount what aspects he most enjoyed. Through a few easy
principles you can learn what makes incredible fellatio
possible.
Below we provide a general discussion of some techniques for
better fellatio. If you're looking for a more detailed approach,
we highly recommend Nina Hartley's Guide To Better Fellatio. Ms.
Hartley explains and demonstrates various fellatio techniques,
gives her own personal insights on arousing your partner, and
shares her years of sexual experience.
Giving great fellatio is not a difficult task once you know
where to begin. First, a word about semen. You may or may not
enjoy the taste of semen (salty and sour with a somewhat viscous
texture) depending on your partner or your own preferences.
Semen tastes different depending on the man. If you prefer not
to swallow or spit the semen, you may ask your partner to signal
you when he reaches the point before climax. At this point,
continue gentle stimulation with your hands. You may also want
to use condoms, which are highly recommended in the practice of
safer sex anyway. Flavored condoms will make it even more
interesting. Another issue for many people is whether or not to
"deep throat" or take the penis past the gag reflex in the
throat. Many people have learnt how to control their gag reflex,
but good fellatio does not depend on deep throating. Many men do
not even notice when you do it.
There's more to fellatio than the penis
Too many people during fellatio concentrate solely on
the penis. The penis does contain highly sensitive erectile
tissue, but there are many other sexually sensitive areas on a
man’s body. Unknown to many are the pleasures that men receive
from having their entire genital area massaged. During oral sex
the penis can be stimulated while these other areas are
massaged. Many men like to have their scrotum and testes fondled
or licked during oral sex. This could be as simple as placing
your hand and cupping the scrotum, or as bold as taking the
testes into your mouth. The most erogenous zones on a man’s
genitals include the back of the head of the penis, the line of
skin that runs down the center of the testicles, and the
underside of the shaft of the penis. Try stimulating these areas
with your tongue as well as taking the entire penis into the
mouth.
Another form of stimulation that many men like is to have their
perineum stroked. The perineum is the area in between the
scrotum and the anus. This area is sensitive when the male is
aroused. You may like to try rigorously massaging the perineum
just prior to orgasm which gives many men a rush of pleasure.
Some men like to have their prostate massaged during oral sex as
well. This is accomplished by placing your finger up the man’s
anus. Make sure that your fingernails have been cut short and
place some lubricant on your finger. Gently run your hand from
the perineum to the anus and massage the outside of the anus.
Push your finger in the anus with your palm up. Slowly raise
your finger until you feel a bump. This bump grows throughout
age; it may be the size of a golf ball in young adulthood and
the size of a pear in later life. Stimulation of the prostate is
an incredible sensation that amazes most men.
The main event
Now that you have learned about stimulating the areas
around the penis it is time to learn about how to stimulate the
penis itself. While the penis is a generally sensitive organ,
there are many areas of the penis which are not particularly
responsive to stimulation. When learning how to give great
fellatio you must concentrate on the most sensitive areas of the
penis. The first area which is particularly sensitive is the
frenulum. This is the area just below the head of the penis on
the underside, and is perhaps the most sensitive part of the
penis. The seam of the penis which runs from the scrotum to the
head, the base of the penis, and the entire head of the penis
are other sensitive areas. You can concentrate on these by
licking or sucking just around the particular area.
Once you have the penis in your mouth there are a couple of
guidelines which will make oral sex more pleasurable for your
partner and less stressful for you. First of all, most men do
not like the feeling of teeth on their penis. Teeth can cause
discomfort and may even rip the skin if you are not careful.
There are some men who like a little bit of the friction which
teeth can provide but it is best to minimize teeth to penis
contact. This is easily accomplished by tucking your lips around
your teeth before you perform fellatio. A way to practice is to
place your lips together and teeth apart. Open your lips slowly
while keeping your teeth apart and there you have it. Another
important aspect of fellatio is lubrication. Most people use
their own saliva as lubrication. If you are using a condom for
fellatio, try to buy an unlubricated variety. Lubricated condoms
tend to have a bad taste. If you'd like to try lubricant during
fellatio, you can purchase a flavored lubricant to turn a normal
latex condom into something tasty, or use it on its own for a
unique experience.
These and many other practical tips are available in Nina
Hartley's Guide To Loving a Man. Porn-starlet Nina Hartley
guides the viewer through all she knows about pleasing a man.
The video is infused with humor and real honest advice. If
you're looking for more general information on how to please a
man, then take a look at this video.
Body placement during fellatio: make
sure that you're both comfortable
Finding an agreeable position for fellatio is usually
not a difficult task. The key aspects are that the man is
comfortable and that the person performing fellatio has access
to the genitals. With an erect penis there is an additional
consideration; the person giving head should be positioned so
that the angle of the penis and the angle of the giver’s throat
are somewhat aligned.
A common position for fellatio is when the man receiving sits or
lies on a bed with his partner kneeling or laying on the ground
in front of him. This gives the person who is performing oral
sex complete access to the penis, scrotum and anus. The position
is also at a good angle for the throat so that entry of the
penis into the mouth is not a problem. (Note: if you do not like
the man receiving fellatio to stroke your hair or face during
oral sex then tell him beforehand. It can be extremely
non-erotic if both of you are turned off by his gesture.)
Another position that may interest you and your partner is to
allow the man to very carefully insert and withdraw the penis
from the mouth. Typically the performer of fellatio will lie
comfortably on the bed and receive his or her partner from
above. If you are trying this position for the first time then
it may be a good idea to have the man hold the base of his penis
so that the penis doesn't enter so far as to put pressure on
your gag reflex.
You may also want to try mutual oral sex in the ‘69’ position.
This can be accomplished either with one partner above on all
fours, or laying on each other’s sides. In the case of
male-female mutual oral sex, you may want to try having the man
lay on his back so the woman can better control penetration in
her mouth.
- What is cunnilingus?
Cunnilingus is the act of using the mouth to
stimulate the female genitals. This can include sucking or
licking the outer and inner areas of the vagina, and most often
involves direct stimulation of the clitoris. Some women find
cunnilingus to be the most satisfying sexual act. Indeed, a
great number of women report that oral sex is the only way they
can achieve orgasm. Toys are being produced to mimic the
sensations of cunnilingus.
- Techniques to better cunnilingus
The clitoris is central to female sexual arousal, as
it contains most of the sexually charged tissues in the body.
The logical first step for many lovers, therefore, is to
directly stimulate the clitoris right off the bat. The catch is
many women will not be very responsive to this
jump-for-the-clitoris approach. Take things slow at first,
kissing and licking her stomach and thighs, then the area around
her clitoris. Build her arousal level slowly, gradually
increasing pressure and speed with your mouth. Once you know
she’s aroused (i.e. if she’s told you or motioned so) you can
then move to the clitoris.
Many women enjoy a massage of the mons. The mons in the mound of
skin which is found on top the pubic bone above the vaginal
opening. Take one or both of your hands and carefully move the
mons and surrounding area much the same way you would massage
someone's shoulders. Be careful not to press too hard or make
too wide a circular movement. As you manually stimulate the mons,
you can move your mouth to the vulva. When soothing her vulva
with your tongue, you may wish to concentrate solely on the
clitoris after some stimulation of the labia or you may wish to
lick the surrounding areas. Some women need constant clitoral
stimulation to reach orgasm so ask your partner what she would
have you do. Clitoral stimulation can be exciting but don't be
too eager.
The way that you use your tongue is important. Provide different
textures by altering the natural flex of your tongue. When your
tongue hangs limp and flat, it provides a soft caress. When your
tongue is flexed and rigid it provides more direct and firm
stimulation. Try some of each and determine which your partner
prefers. Some women will want rapid motions of continuous
licking while others prefer long, slow caresses.
When a woman becomes sexually aroused her vagina balloons and
her uterus rises. Women often enjoy the feeling of penetration
during oral sex. This penetration can be well lubricated fingers
or a dildo. Gently follow the natural curvature of the vagina
for smooth entry.
- Performing better cunnilingus
Two things should accompany you any time that you
engage in oral sex: being comfortable with yourself and your
partner, and your ability to communicate.
- Feeling comfortable
If you feel uncomfortable about performing or
receiving oral sex, don't do it. It is better to stop, relax and
communicate about your feeling with your partner before you
begin. Oral sex involves very intimate areas, in the most
intimate ways. It explores tastes, smells and feelings unlike
any other form of lovemaking. Feeling comfortable about your
body and your partner may take time, and you should take all the
time you need. The results will be better for both of you.
- Good Communication
You will never know what your partner wants or finds
satisfying unless you talk to them. If it is your first time
with a particular partner, communication may seem uncomfortable.
Don't worry. Do you really think that your new partner will be
annoyed or upset if you ask her what she wants? A vast majority
of women will be quite pleased. Do not be discouraged if you
partner offers you advice; be overjoyed because you are learning
what they find pleasurable which will make you a better lover as
a result. A sense of humor is another great way to ease any
tension which may exist between new lovers. A light-hearted
approach to your sexual encounter will make it more enjoyable
for both of you.
- Positioning for better cunnilingus
Before launching into a detailed discussion of
techniques, let's consider the range of possible positions for
cunnilingus. Each position will be uniquely satisfying, so it is
best for you and your partner to experiment and determine which
one(s) you prefer. Most couples begin with the woman sitting in
a chair or on the bed. This gives full access to the genitals
and support to the back so that the woman is relaxed and her
hands are free to stimulate herself. The partner performing oral
sex can lie or sit facing the woman, free to use his or her
hands for stimulation with the fingers.
Another popular position is for the woman to squat on all fours
over her lover's face as she or he is lying down. Some people
prefer this position because it allows a woman to move her
pelvis to accentuate the stimulation. This position also allows
a couple to mutually stimulate one another (the so-called ‘69’)
when it is performed each partner at opposite ends. If you are a
more meticulous giver of oral sex, you may not like this
position because it is difficult to place your tongue right
where you want it. Couples who wish to engage in playful
dominance-submissive role playing might like to try standing
while the other partner performs oral sex on his or her knees.
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